We’ll Keep You Safe
Even if you think you’re an adult with agency and responsibility, we know that you’re actually a shrinking violet of the frailer sex, who needs protection from the world and herself, says the National Panhellenic Conference to University of Virginia’s 2,000-odd sorority sisters:
At some U-Va. chapters in recent days, students described mandatory emergency meetings with representatives from their national chapter telling them they risked suspension, fines and other penalties if any of them attended bid night parties. Boys’ Bid Night is typically a night when sorority sisters go from house to house sharing drinks with friends.
Now some sororities are planning mandatory in-house retreats that night, to avoid any risk of inadvertently violating the rule.
At some chapters, women were told not only to avoid going to fraternity parties on Boys’ Bid Night, but to avoid any social gathering with fraternity members
You are clearly not responsible for your own actions and choices, we must protect you from those awful boys.
You know, it would probably be best, since boys are so incredibly terrible and obviously not a one of them have any self control (Rolling Stone has proved that positive of course), that we set apart special “Women’s Safe Spaces” in restaurants and public spaces. We could even put screens between the sections so that our brave sisters don’t have to endure the patriarchal male gaze.
You know, in fact, we should also institute an entirely new way of dressing that frees women from the aforementioned visual rape continuously perpetuated upon them by those dirty men, and rejects the shallow and misogynistic concepts of modern capitalism-centered beauty.
You know, it’s really unsafe out there, and we can’t “blame the victim” by expecting women to learn and behave in ways that don’t directly place them in harm. We really should have special bodyguards to make sure women don’t get themselves into any trouble.
But, you know, you really can’t trust those frat boys, steeped as they are in anti-woman rape-encouraging culture. A woman should really have a male family member accompany her to any gathering where there will be a group of men. She can even wear her new beauty-positive clothing as a statement!
Together, sisters, we’ll show them how strong modern women are!